Because He Luvs Me...

i always make a point to post on Valentines day or about it at least. this year is a somber one for me. i love valentines still dont get me wrong...just not this one. i got roses from my daddy this year and they are beautiful :) i got them a week ago and they are still gorgeous. my roommate walked past and asked me "how are your flowers still so pretty?" i said, "because they luv me" prolly cuz they also kno i need it right now. iv just been thinkin that every girl doesnt get swept off her feet ya kno? love doesnt solve the problem of life. life happens. sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt. and maybe i should be ok with that. im so angry and tired. seems like im always wrong. i kno wat im supposed to do and yet it is so hard for some reason. its right there in front of me and yet... most days i dont even want it. real life hurts. its so much easier to just hide away in fantasies and fairytales. its a daily struggle against myself and more often than not i lose. ive been a Christian my whole life and instead of getting easier it just gets harder and harder. every time i stray from God i find out the hard way y He gave me a conscience. it irks me that i am so easily enticed away from His protection. iv never really had to fight before. it has always been so easy. but now...i seem to fail at every turn. Why does God let these things happen? y cant i just figure it out the easy way? y does He let me get into these situations and wind up with my heart broken? ....Because He luvs me...