Just Jesus And Me

As a Protestant Christian I have grown up understanding sin and how it affects my life. I learned in high school that I am supposed to confess my sins to other people, not just God. I never really understood why I should tell other people about my sins, after all my sin is between Jesus and me. Only on certain occasions when I hurt other people did I feel the need to express my sorrow to those particular people. I have always been very private and so afraid to make mistakes that it was hard for me to ever admit my faults to others that those faults did not directly affect. And why should I? Would that change anything except that now someone had the power to judge me and hold my failures over my head. My junior year of high school I had a very bad experience with confessing sin. I did so begrudgingly because I was told it was the right thing to do. After this damaging experience of admitting to an ongoing sin, I determined that from then on I would handle things on my own. Just Jesus and me. We could overcome this without me ever getting hurt or embarrassed again. It is not other people’s job to judge and condemn me, or to tell me that I need to fix myself. If I just lean on Jesus more and give my life to him, no one ever needs to know what I’m really like.

A popular phrase while I was growing up was “Keep it Real.” My generation is so opposed to posers and fakers, anyone who tries to be what they aren’t. The funny thing is that is what we all end up doing. Especially in Christian circles where we should be able to be the most brutally honest about how messed up we are and how depraved we can be, we put on a smile and say “things are good” because everyone knows that a good Christian struggles with things like loving people, and giving to the poor, not sexual addiction, self loathing and depression, suicidal thoughts, same sex attraction, illegal substance abuse, and the ability to cope with emotions on a daily basis. Why should we be honest about those things? Is it so we can shame each other into getting our act together? Of course not! The purpose of confessing sins is not so that we can point fingers at each other and say “just stop it!” According to Romans 7 we CAN’T just stop it.

“So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God’s law, but in my sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.”

I don’t believe that allowing ourselves to be beaten into submission by either our own hand or the hand of a fellow believer is the way to go about solving this sin problem. That is not what accountability is about. That being said, I also do not believe it is about comparing ourselves to see who is the best at being good and putting on a happy smile every Sunday. Just because we are saved by grace does not mean that we should act like we don’t struggle with sin anymore. In fact, it is because we are saved by grace that we can be honest with one another since we do not stand condemned. Hebrews 10 says,

“Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.”

This is why we CAN be honest and “real” with each other. But that still begs the question why SHOULD we? Verses 24 and 25 go on to say,

“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

The point of accountability is to encourage one another. To remind each other that we are under grace and that we do not have to beat ourselves up over our sin after we have repented. I was talking to my older brother a few weeks ago and he said something that really struck me even though I’ve known this before. He said that God paid for all our sin; past, present, and future. When I was justified, all the sin I have ever committed or ever will commit was covered and paid for. It is not a surprise to God when I sin. It is not the same as a straight A student bringing home an all F report card to shocked and disappointed parents. It saddens God when I fail but it does not surprise Him. He knew every time I would fail and every time in the future I will fail. God does not expect perfection from me.

Christians should not expect perfection from each other either. The point of accountability is so that we can learn humility, and so we can help each other. It is ridiculous how close so many of our struggles are to each other. This is so that we can walk through life together picking each other up when we fall and encouraging each other when we fail. Or first thought should always be, “You’re not a lost cause yet. You’re not a lost cause yet.” Christ is still at work in Christians that take a swan dive off the deep end. That verse talks about spurring one another on. It reminds me of a good jockey and his horse. When he is racing with the horse, the horse and rider become one. They move together and the jockey encourages, pushes and challenges the horse. When he encourages the horse he is also encouraging himself and reminding himself to keep going. The church is supposed to become one body with the many members encouraging, pushing and challenging each other but not beating each other into submission. As we run the race together we should not be afraid to bear our souls to one another and help each other even as we limp along the way.

Christ is our ultimate source of life but I think that Christians need to get away from this “Just Jesus and me” mentality, because it isn’t Biblical. We were made for relationships, and we were made to do life and Christianity together. We also need to remember that the point of accountability is to encourage and love each other. Any thoughts?

A Happy Ending at Tiffany's

well its that time of year again. Valentines day. (yes im 2 days late) and i am compelled to continue in my tradition of commenting on this sacred day of loveyness. lol a friend commented to me the other day that the initials of Single's Awareness Day spell SAD... it made me chuckle. jess and i had chips and dip and watched Breakfast at Tiffany's V-day evening. it is one of my favorite romances and im just now reflecting on why that is. i guess it is because even though she cant really take care of herself, and she has all these issues, he still loves her anyway. i love that movie because they are raw characters that are both hoplessly flawed but they make each other better and love each other in spite of the flaws. the movie is a sad one, but i feel like it is closer to real life than a lot of modern romances and the ending is happy. she finally gets a grip on reality, and he steps up to be a man. i think that if two people can overcome their issues with each other, then maybe they will turn out all right. when they can see each other at their worst, and still give grace, empathy and love... it can turn into something pretty great.